Why These are the Best Car Seats for Twins

Buying safe, durable, and easy to install car seats are every parents desire, but the research process can be very overwhelming.

As parents of twins, we know first-hand how challenging it all can be. Therefore, we have done all the research for you!

We’ve narrowed it down to the very best, while providing you with a few competitive choices.

All of our recommendations for the best car sets for twins met our stringent standards:

• Have Excellent Safety Ratings
• Received Excellent Ratings and Recommendations from Actual Consumers
• Are Affordable
• Can Be Quickly Purchased Online from Our Site

The Best Newborn Infant Car Seats for Twins

We recommend you purchase a car seat that can be separated from its base, while keeping you newborn nestled in the car seat. When infants are extremely young, they spend most of their time sleeping. These car seats will allow you to easily transport you sleeping twins.

We also recommend you buy a Baby Trend Universal Double Snap-N-Go Stroller Frame. This will be the first stroller you use. It is lightweight and compatible with the infant car seats.

Here’s a comparison of the different Graco SnugRide Infant Car Seats:

All use the InRight latch system. It is a game changer!

They have made a one-second connection with the base with its 4-position recline and an easy-to-read level indicator bubble that helps eliminate installation guesswork.

While both of our recommendations are about 2lbs heavier than the other SnugRides, they are the best infant car seats Graco has yet to design.

1. Graco SnugRide SnugLock 35 LX Featuring TrueShield Technology

Not Pictured in Above Table

Weight Recommendation: 4lbs to 35lbs

Colors: 1 Color Available

Lowest Price: Amazon.com

Price: $126.97

Amazon Rating:

Below, we have outlined the pros and cons of this product:

Pros:

★ Advantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– TrueShield Technology helps keep you infant safe by providing advanced protection from head to hips in the event of a side impact.

★ Adjust handle with one hand, leaving your other hand free– With twins, this is an even more helpful feature.

★ Silent Shade canopy easily and quietly adjusts without disturbing baby– Never wake a sleeping baby.

★ InRight LATCH system for a one-second LATCH attachment– Both of our recommendations have this feature. It is a big upgrade from their previous hook system.

★ 4-position adjustable base lets you customize fit to you vehicle– This ensures that the baby will be in the safest position for breathing, no matter the depths of you seats.

★ Easy-to-read level indicator helps eliminate installation guesswork– You will know for certain that the car seat is level, without having to simply guess.

★ Fits into Our Recommended Baby Trend Snap-n-Go Stroller– We recommend every new parent of twins use a Baby Trend Universal Double Snap-N-Go Stroller Frame for you first stroller. These car sets fit perfectly into the frame.

Cons:

• Disadvantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– A bit heavier than the others.

• Requires a bit of Force to Secure into Base– The car seat securely snaps into the base, but it does require a small bit of doing to snap it in.

2. Graco SnugRide SnugLock 35 Elite Infant Car Seat

* Pictured Second From Left in Above Table*

Weight Recommendation: 4lbs to 35lbs

Colors: 3 Colors Available

Lowest Price: Amazon.com

Price: $149.98- $188.99

Amazon Rating:

Below, we have outlined the pros and cons of this product:

Pros:

★ Advantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– The InRight Latch System! Install is super simple.

★ Quick and Easy to Install– SnugLock Technology features a hassle-free 3-step installation rear-facing car seat helps protect infants from 4 to 35 lb and up to 32″ quick and easy clean up with the Rapid Remove cover.

★ Safest Infant Car Seat– Simply Safe Adjust Harness System adjusts headrest and harness together to prevent rethreading Safety Core absorbs frontal crash forces:

• Side Impact Tested*
• New Car Assessment Program (NCAP) – peak crash force approximately 2X Car Seat Standard.
• Extreme Car Interior Temperatures.

*In addition to meeting or exceeding all applicable US safety standards, the Graco SnugRide SnugLock 35 Elite Infant Car Seat has been side impact tested for occupant retention by the harness system.

★ Reclining Base Allows for Great Rest– Adjustable base with 4 recline positions and easy-to-read bubble level indicator InRight LATCH system for a one-second LATCH attachment.

★ Rotating Canopy– Window and visor provides shade and sun protection for baby removable newborn head and body support cushions baby.

★ Fits into Our Recommended Baby Trend Snap-n-Go Stroller– We recommend every new parent of twins use a Baby Trend Universal Double Snap-N-Go Stroller Frame for you first stroller. These car sets fit perfectly into the frame.

Cons:

• Disadvantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– Can only be used up to 65lbs.

• Requires Force to Secure into Base– The car seat securely snaps into the base, but it does require a bit of strength to snap it in.

The Complete 4 Car Seats in 1 for Twins

If you are looking for ONE car seat that you can use from birth until you twins no longer require a booster seat, this is the best option:

3. Graco 4Ever 4-in-1 Convertible Car Seat

Recommended Weight: 4lbs to 120lbs

Colors: 11 Colors to Choose From

Lowest Price: Amazon.com

Price: $239.99- $339.99

Amazon Rating:

Below, we have outlined the pros and cons of this product:

Pros:

★ The Only Car Seat You Will Ever Need– This 4-in-1 Convertible Car Seat gives you 10 years of use from 4lbs to 120 pounds. It can be used as a rear-facing baby car seat from 4lbs to 40 lbs. It can then be used forward-facing for your toddlers car seat from 20 to 65 lbs.

★ The Safest Available– Graco has been a trusted brand for over 100 years. Of all of Graco’s car seats, this is among the very safest. The patented Simply Safe Adjust Harness System is safe and simple to use.

★ Becomes a Booster Seat– High back belt-positioning mode from 30lbs to 100 lbs and backless belt-positioning mode from 40lbs to 120 lbs.

★ Quick and Easy to Secure in Your Vehicle– InRight LATCH system for an easy, 1-second LATCH attachment

★ Machine-washable Seat Cushions–The metal and plastic parts may be cleaned with mild soap and cool water and the buckle may be cleaned with a damp cloth and the harness straps may be spot cleaned.

Cons:

• Headrest Rattles– Some complain the headrest rattles and must be tightened.

The Best Convertible Car Seats for Twins

We believe these are the safest, most durable and most versatile car seats. Each of these has advantages over others. We will help you determine which of these is best for you twins.

Once you twins outgrow their infant car seats, these car seats will change to adjust to the needs of you growing kids.

4. Graco Extend2Fit Convertible Car Seat

Recommended Weight: 5lbs to 65lbs

Colors: 8 Options

Lowest Price: Amazon.com

Price: $134.28- $225.61

Amazon Rating:

Below, we have outlined the pros and cons of this product:

Pros:

★ Advantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– A bit less expensive than others

★ Helps protect rear-facing infants from 4-50 lbs and forward-facing toddlers from 22-65 lbs.

★ 4-position extension panel adjusts to provide 5″ additional leg room allowing you child to ride safely rear-facing longer; Up to 50 pounds rear-facing allowing you child to ride safely rear-facing for longer.

★ 6-position recline helps keep you child comfy.

★ 10-position headrest adjusts easily for you growing child.

★ Simply Safe Adjust Harness System adjusts the height of the harness and headrest in one motion.

★ InRight LATCH system for an easy, one-second LATCH attachment; easy-to-read level indicator for hassle-free installation.

★ Engineered & rigorously crash tested to meet or exceed US Standard FMVSS 213; Extend2Fit convertible car seat has been side-impact tested for occupant retention solely with the built-in 5-point harness system.

Cons:

• Disadvantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– Can only be used up to 65lbs.

5. Graco SlimFit All-in-One Convertible Car Seat 

Recommended Weight: 5lbs to 100lbs

Colors: 2 Options

Lowest Price: Amazon.com

Price: $181.83- $195.49

Amazon Rating:

Below, we have outlined the pros and cons of this product:

Pros:

★ Advantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– The best choice for smaller cars. This car seat is narrower than the others and is perfect for small backseats.

★ All-in-One seat grows with you child from 5-100 lb, rear- to forward-facing and becomes a belt-positioning booster; save space in your back seat with unique rotating cup holders

★ Simply Safe Adjust Harness System adjusts the height of the harness and headrest; integrated harness storage compartment holds unused harness straps while the seat is a belt positioning booster

★ Engineered & crash tested to meet or exceed US standard FMVSS 213; the SlimFit car seat has been side impact tested for occupant retention solely with the built-in 5-point harness system; features EPS foam

★ InRight LATCH system for an easy, one-second LATCH attachment; 4-position recline helps keep you growing child comfy, in rear and forward-facing modes

★ Plush supports keep you child comfortable and are removable; washable seat cover is easy to access without removing the harness

★ Steel-reinforced frame provides strength and durability

Cons:

• Disadvantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– A bit less cushion compared to the other ones.

6. Graco Size4Me 65 Convertible Car Seat Featuring RapidRemove

Recommended Weight: 4lbs to 65lbs

Colors: 4 Options

Lowest Price: Amazon.com

Price: $154.99- $179.99

Amazon Rating:

Below, we have outlined the pros and cons of this product:

Pros:

★ Advantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– The RapidRemove cover is awesome! While with other car seats, you have to physically take it apart to remove the cover from it, the RapidRemove cover comes off in less than a minute! No need to uninstall it.

★ Designed to help protect you rear-facing infant from 4-40 lbs. and you forward-facing toddler from 22-65 lbs.

★ Simply Safe Adjust Harness System adjusts the height of you harness and headrest to 8 positions, in one motion, to ensure that you child is always properly secured

★ Side-impact tested-in addition to meeting or exceeding all applicable U.S. safety standards, the Size4Me car seat has been side-impact tested for occupant retention solely with the built-in 5 point harness system Machine-washable

★ In Right LATCH system for an easy, one-second LATCH attachment.

Cons:

• Disadvantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– Only goes up to 65lbs.

The Best Car Seat for Special Needs Twins

7. Graco 4Ever Extend2Fit All in One Convertible Car Seat

Recommended Weight: 4lbs to 120lbs

Colors: 5 Options

Lowest Price: Amazon.com

Price: $209.99- $349.99

Amazon Rating:

Below, we have outlined the pros and cons of this product:

Pros:

★ Advantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– Can use for up to 120lbs. It is the Ideal car seat for special needs kids who may need to remain in a car seat longer.

★ 4-in-1 seat grows with you child, so you can enjoy 10 years of use, from 4 to 120 lb

★ Extend2Fit 4-position extension panel provides 5″ additional leg room

★ Up to 50 lb rear-facing allowing you child to safely ride rear-facing longer plush inserts keep you child comfortable washable seat cover is easy to remove without removing the harness

★ Simply Safe Adjust Harness System headrest and Harness adjust together one-hand, 10-position adjustable headrest easily adapts for you growing child

★ In Right LATCH system for an easy, one-second LATCH attachment integrated belt lock-off for easy vehicle seat belt installation easy-to-read level indicator helps eliminate rear-facing installation guesswork

★ 2 integrated cup holders keeps you child’s drinks or snacks close at hand integrated harness storage compartment holds unused harness straps while in the belt positioning booster mode

★ Steel-reinforced frame provides strength and durability. Integrated harness storage compartment holds unused harness straps while in the belt positioning booster mode

Cons:

• Disadvantage over Other Convertible Car Seats in Above Table– This car seat is a bit more expensive than our other recommendations

In summary, there are two types of car seats you will need for your twins. The first car seat will be used for your newborn twins. It will include a base that remains in your car and a removable carrier. The removable carrier will allow you to transport your twins without waking them up.

The second type of car seat will be a convertible car seat. Some of the recommendations above will convert into a booster seat when your children no longer need the restraint portion.

One of the recommendations we have included will even allow you to use the car seat with a child up to 120 pounds. This would be our suggestion for children with special needs who will need to remain in a car seat longer.

The post The Best Car Seats for Twins appeared first on TWINS Magazine.

Multiple multiples? Where do you even start to count your blessings?

At the best of times, parenting is a challenge. Add several sets of children all going through the “terrible twos,” the “ferocious fours” or the troubled teenage years at the same time, and the thought is often enough to make someone go a bit crazy. Where do you find the strength and energy? What kind of support is available? How does your marriage survive when it seems that life is focussed on the children? How do you have a normal life, and what does a “normal” life even look like?

We sat down with two families in Canada’s Golden Horseshoe to discuss parenting multiple sets of twins, to learn what their lives are like, what unique challenges they deal with every day, and what advice would they give to other parents in the same parenting boat.

Multiples often run in families so news of expecting twins is not that surprising for some families. For Kim Tait of Oakville, the news that she was expecting a second set of twins wasn’t as surprising or shocking as you might think. She says, “I just knew. I think your brain prepares you for this type of shocking information. We weren’t trying for more kids, so when I got pregnant again, I knew it was (twins) and wasn’t surprised when they told me.” For Lyndsay Petican of Burlington, the news was taken pragmatically. “We were like yes, this is what we do! We make twins. We already had the infrastructure, like car seats, cribs, and highchairs,” she explains.

We asked both families what they did differently with each set, or wish they had. For the Taits, they agree they became smarter the second time around. “With the first set we both tried to be up all the time to feed them; we realized with the second set that it’s impossible. So, we split the night up, doing shift work. My husband liked staying up late so as soon as my older daughter went to bed, I’d go to bed and wake up at 4 a.m. and start my day then. The babies would eat around 2-3 a.m. and then again around 5-6am. Feeding two crying babies in the middle of the night on no sleep is no party, but we found a system and stuck with it. It became easier with time.” For Lyndsay she explains that she definitely has a different viewpoint on parenthood, perhaps as any second time parent might. She tries to remember that “everything is a stage, and where newborn twins is really hard, it too is just a phase.”

As her kids started school, Lyndsay is learning from her actions with her older girls. She kept her daughters together until grade one, and then had them separated in school, as they began wanting their own friends and experiences. She’s been thinking of separating her sons earlier so they can grow more independent.

If there’s any advice either family would have liked to have in advance of having their second set of twins, it would be, according to Lyndsay, to “just be kind to yourself, try not to fixate on what you can’t do, and enjoy the things that you can. It is really hard at the beginning but it pays off in dividends doubly later.” For Kim, she said knowing what to expect probably made things a bit worse. “I knew it was going to be insane, and it was. We had four little boys in diapers at the same time.”

Many couples struggle with maintaining the romance in their marriage once kids come along. We wondered if having not just one, but two sets of children, and maybe even a singleton or two in addition, changes this part of their relationship dramatically? Or, does it strengthen a marriage in ways other couples might not understand? According to Lyndsay Petican, “My husband and I work as a great team… we have to. We try to get alone time where we can by grabbing a breakfast date or a quiet cup of coffee before all the kids awaken. We found it was easier when I was working to meet for breakfast rather than going out for dinner. We had a lot of our date nights by just making dinner and hanging out. Once every couple of months we go out for dinner and every year we have a kid-free vacation to Vegas or Nashville to relax.”

Kim’s experience is a bit different. “I would be lying if I said it didn’t have an impact on our marriage; this is hard. We are both working full-time, I commute an hour and all the kids have activities, so we are running in different directions all the time. Our kids are still young, so they need us for a lot of things; for now, we divide and conquer and at the end of the day we are exhausted and start all over again the next day. We don’t have a lot of time to just sit and talk, but as they say, this is a season of life, it’s constantly evolving and changing. Date nights are a challenge too. They get expensive quickly as we tend to have to hire two people to watch the kids. Add dinner and a movie and the cost adds up. So we don’t get to do it much unfortunately.”

Self-care is an aspect of life that is challenging for all parents, but even more for parents of multiples. Lindsay says her children’s nap time is very important to her, she tries to work out during one of the nap times, and online shopping has become very important to her, in order to keep her sense of self sometimes.

Support from family and the community is also invaluable as parents of multiples sometimes feel isolated because they can’t find time for themselves or time to leave the house to run errands or take part in recreational programs with all their children. Both women agree that without either a nanny or family members to help out, life would most definitely be more challenging. Lyndsay explains that with her first set of twins she “hung around singleton moms and felt very sad about the activities that I didn’t feel I could manage on my own (i.e., swimming, hikes). I spent a good bit of time grieving the maternity leave that I thought I would have. On my second mat leave with my boy twins I hung out with a lot of twin mamas; we mostly hung out at other people’s houses to keep all of our kids contained and less stress-free.” For her own well-being, and so an outing wouldn’t end up in tears (either the children’s or her own) she stopped signing up for programs that she knew were going to be unsuccessful for their family dynamic. Lyndsay also had support from her Mother-in-Law who would watch the boys to allow her to leave the house by herself and run errands. That was a much-needed break.

For the Taits, who have no immediate family nearby and have full-time jobs that often require travel, a nanny was the only way they could survive. When the nanny wasn’t available or one of the parents was out of town, their kids became used to doing their homework at a sports arena while the other siblings had a hockey practice. “We just drag them all along,” she explains.

We wanted to know if there exists any extra government of community support for parents with multiples. Lyndsay explains that she joined a twin mom group and they were a great support during maternity leave. “Maternity leave with twins is not relaxing, a longer maternity leave of two years would’ve really been great as you only received one year (when I was on mat leave).” She recently began volunteering with the Halton Breastfeeding Connection to support new moms and new twin moms with breastfeeding. It’s her way of giving back. For Kim, she wishes there had been more financial support when they had to have two nannies. “There is a maximum we can deduct for childcare on our taxes; we have definitely exceeded that each year. I wish there was flexibility there!” They have, however, found some support with rEcess Oakville, a respite program that offers free care to children with disabilities and their siblings while their parents enjoy a night out once a month.

For all the joys that multiple multiples bring, there are of course, emotional challenges. As might be expected, for both women, finding individual time to spend with each child is difficult but much-needed. For Kim, who has an older singleton daughter, she especially tries to spend some alone time with her because she knows her daughter needs that alone time the most. Both women agree that finding quality one-on-one time with each child is what they have the most mom guilt about.

Every parent wishes they could bond equally with their kids. For parents of multiples, it can seem like a daunting or impossible pipe dream. Lyndsay’s advice to new parents of multiple multiples is “be kind to yourself. Some days one child is needier than the other and then the next day it changes. It will not always be fair and equal, but you try to do the best for those kids and their own temperaments.” For Kim, her family has its own challenges, as her two youngest twins both have special needs, so she realizes she must spend more time with them. Her son Zackery is on the autism spectrum and she expresses, “he has definitely taught me so much about humans in general. I thought I knew how to parent, but boy has he challenged me in absolutely every way. There are days where all our focus is on him. His twin has moderate to severe ADHD, so he is always very busy. I make a point of spending time with my daughter alone, but I know this is a constant challenge and I’m very aware of it.”

Aside from bonding and finding time for each child, what seems to be the biggest challenge of having multiple multiples? “The price of daycare for multiples is crippling,” says Lyndsay. It can be as much as a second mortgage. Kim explains for them, it’s time management and not having a big safety net. That frustration of the unknown from day to day, makes this really hard sometimes. It especially hits home when there are health emergencies and everything seems so overwhelming.

We wondered how their families are coping with the isolation and quarantine of Covid-19? Lyndsay admits, “So much togetherness time has the increased the sibling fighting. My kids are happiest when we go out on adventures, but with limited adventures and limited contact with friends, especially for my 10-year-olds, this has been especially difficult. But in many ways, it has been easier too. Lindsay explains, “Our mornings are way less hectic. We let the girls sleep in. We don’t have to rush to make lunches. My husband has been home to help a lot more as he hasn’t been travelling for work.” And Kim agrees, “I think there is where big families shine. I can kick them out into the backyard, and they all play together and can entertain themselves (and each other). I think having a single child might be harder than five!”

In conclusion, the greatest joy for both families is seeing how all their children interact and love each other. For Kim, who herself is an only child, she didn’t understand the dynamics of siblings before she had children. “Watching the five of them interact is fascinating to me. I love just sitting back and watching them work through something together without us intervening. My daughter being the oldest, tends to take charge and all four boys listen to her lead. I think she will benefit from this role in her own life. And certainly, for the kids to have each other once we are gone is reassuring.”

For parents of multiple multiples, life is definitely busy, crazy, fun, exhausting and so much more. It’s parenting, multiplied. It’s also blessings, multiplied.

The post Double Double – life with two sets of twins appeared first on TWINS Magazine.

Nothing was easy about Desiree Childress’s third pregnancy. Soon after she and her husband, Will, learned they were expecting identical twin boys, she experienced severe nausea. Having trouble holding anything down, she became dehydrated and IV lines for fluids were placed.

At about 18 weeks, preterm labor began and strict at-home bed rest prescribed. With two young daughters at home, Tiffany, 9, and Victoria, 5, Desiree found staying off her feet and reducing stress nearly impossible. Five weeks later, she was hospitalized.

Both nurses, Desiree and Will knew that these early complications and a twin pregnancy increased the likelihood of a premature delivery. Over 50% of multiples are born prematurely (before 37 weeks gestation), or weigh less than five and one-half pounds. Many preemie multiples require weeks of hospitalization and special medical attention.

By getting expert care in the hospital, Desiree hoped her babies would arrive close to term, but she also wanted to be prepared for the unexpected. David and Isaiah were born eight weeks early, each weighing a little over three pounds. “You really can’t prepare for the reality of delivering preemies, but knowing what to expect made it a little less overwhelming,” she says.

Julie Medas, a clinical neonatal nurse specialist at MetroHealth Medical Center in Cleveland, Ohio, agrees. She says that learning about the neonatal intensive care nursery (the NICU) and what a preemie looks like “won’t provide comfort, but it will give parents a sense of familiarity should their babies arrive early and need special care.”

Taking a Tour

Medas recommends that parents experiencing pregnancy complications ask for a tour of the NICU and visit a baby of comparable gestational age. “The perception is that seeing a preemie will overwhelm parents, but sometimes the imagination is far worse,” she says.

A neonatologist or a neonatal nurse can explain some of the medical equipment and common problems of preemies. Your hospital may also offer a video or booklet about the NICU. If information becomes stressful, cut your visit short and come back another day.

“The NICU can seem like a foreign land with an unfamiliar language,” says Medas. Take your time to absorb this new world, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Some suggestions:

* What are visiting hours, and who can visit?
* Will my babies be placed near each other?
* How can I participate in my babies’ care?
* Does the NICU encourage skin-to-skin contact, music therapy, or infant massage?
* Are multiples co-bedded (placed in the same bed)?
* What resources are available to parents of premature babies and multiples?
* Is there a developmental program (occupational and physical therapy) for preemies?
* Is there a place for parents to spend the night?
* Is CPR training offered?

Researching Resources
On bed rest and with time on her hands, Desiree created a notebook of resources she’d need after the twins’ birth: “I made a list of dependable support systems, those who I could really count on like my church to provide meals and sitters my girls really liked.” She also included important names and phone numbers, such as her insurance provider and pediatrician, and she rented a pager so the NICU could reach her.

To find out what services and help you may need following your babies’ birth, talk with your hospital social worker or a nurse. Also, ask if there are any local preemie parent or mothers of multiples support groups: A parent of preemie multiples can offer first-hand advice. Mothers of Supertwins (631-859-1110) and The Triplet Connection (209-474-0885) offer programs and literature to support expectant mothers of multiples.

Desiree joined a mothers of multiples club in her third trimester. “At first, it was scary because all of the mothers of twins in the group had delivered prematurely,” she says, “but it also gave me hope to see that their children were okay, and they offered great support.”

Breastmilk Basics
When you’re coping with pregnancy complications and the risk of premature babies, thinking about breastfeeding can be daunting, to say the least. But learning about breast milk and how it can help your babies is something important you can do for your babies.

“Some doctors consider breast milk a medicine for preemies,” says Medas. Research shows breastmilk is less stressful on a preemie’s digestive system and kidneys, provides important antibodies that fight infection, and protects against allergies.

Babies who are born very small and very sick will not have the ability to breastfeed during their first days or weeks of life, but they can receive breast milk through a feeding tube placed in their nose or mouth. This means mothers have to pump and store their milk. A lactation consultant with knowledge of a preemie’s special needs can provide instruction. Ask your pediatrician, the hospital staff, or the La Leche League (800-525-3243) for a referral. Many NICUs have lending libraries that include breast-feeding books and videos, too.

“Even if you can’t or choose not to breastfeed, you can still provide your babies with the best nutrition possible,” says Medas. And it’s something only you, a mother, can do.

Preemie Parenthood
“I was prepared for the monitors and technology in the NICU, but it was still overwhelming to see those two tiny little babies,” says Desiree. “I couldn’t see their faces because of the wires and tape. I couldn’t hold them or feed them. I felt like I had really lost out.”

If your babies’ birth can’t be delayed and you become a parent of preemie multiples, like Desiree and Will, you’ll face many emotions: guilt, anger, sadness, and fear, to name a few. Having more than one baby adds to the stress: You may have two sets of medical complications to cope with, maybe even two sets of healthcare providers.

Making arrangements for help before your babies’ birth is a good idea (whether or not you delivery prematurely). You’ll need time to take care of yourself so that you’ll have the energy to take care of your babies and family.

After a difficult pregnancy, you’ll also need time to reflect on your losses. To help you cope with your feelings before and after delivery, consider starting a journal, or find someone who listens well (another parent, a social worker, a mental health expert, an Internet chat room (such as the TWINS Magazine Message Board), or a clergy member).

“Remember, feeling is healthy,” says Mara Stein, a Chicago clinical psychologist who delivered twin girls ten weeks early. “But if your feelings start getting in the way of your life, affecting your marriage or other relationships, or you find yourself constantly feeling sad, you may need professional help,” she says. Consult a trained therapist, such as a psychologist, psychiatrist, social worker, or family counselor.

“Becoming a parent of preemies is the hardest thing you’ll ever have to do,” says Desiree, whose twins are now eight months old. “But when I look at David and Isaiah and see them smile, I know it’s all been worth it.”

Amy E. Tracy is the author of The Pregnancy Bed Rest Book (Berkley Trade, 2001), and the co-author of Your Premature Baby and Child (Berkley Trade, 1999). Visit her Web site at www.pregnancybedrest.com.

Who’s Who in the NICU

Neonatologist: a doctor who is specially trained in the care of premature and sick babies
Registered Nurse: has graduated from an accredited school of nursing; these nurses provide much of the daily care of preemies.

Neonatal Nurse Practitioner: a registered nurse who has advanced training in neonatal care.

Clinical Neonatal Nurse Specialist: a registered nurse who has additional neonatal training in patient and nurse education.

Social Worker: can provide information on nonmedical care, such as insurance coverage, emotional support, and transportation.

Respiratory Therapist: a specialist who provides the respiratory needs of ill babies.

Developmental Therapists: help enhance a baby’s physical development.

Medical Specialists: doctors with further specialized training in such areas as the eyes, heart, lungs, and brain.

NICU Baby Books
NICU Notebook: A Parent’s Journal
Available from:
Mothers of Supertwins
PO Box 951
Brentwood, NY 11717
www.mostonline.org
877-434-MOST (6678)

The post Expecting the Unexpected: Preparing for an Early Delivery appeared first on TWINS Magazine.